Welcome back to Your Greatness Magnified. Work. Family. Life.
Today we’re talking about living your purpose. Have you ever had a dream that you’ve started on, that you are ambitiously moving toward; it’s so juicy, it’s so great, and then, as you feel yourself moving toward this greatness, you get cold feet? You wonder whether you can really achieve it. Is it too big, or too ambitious?
Well, I’ll admit, I have. In fact, I really need a bit of help from you. My family and I have made a lot of changes. I left my job, started my own business—going great! We moved to the country-our family is able to be in nature all the time! We have shifted our lifestyle-we have more time with each other! Our kids are doing better, and are all healthier, and spend more time with family and friends. All good. Right?
One of the core anchors to the dream of this new beginning is a beautiful barn. You see, in this vision, my work was going to be in one place and my home in another. I was going to get some work life balance. I was going to be able to facilitate retreats and training on our beautiful property, in the barn. It was going to be a sanctuary, for me and for my clients.
No matter how excited I get, however, all of a sudden, I’m fearful. I roadblock progress. I keep looking at this barn, physically and metaphorically, as a mess. I get stuck in the muck. Why?
Because of one of my greatest fears: debt.
We had to get out of a lot of debt when we jumpstarted our new life; selling our cottage, our house, and everything we didn’t need to make this new dream a reality. Now, we’re faced with the fact that if we move ahead with renovating this beautiful barn, we will add risk and stress to our existence with new debt.
The ironic thing is, I teach people about a solution focused approach; to look at all the many things that are working and then identify just 1 or 2 things that aren’t. Whatever adjustments you make, don’t change the things that are working. Don’t get caught down the rabbit hole of seeing life for its problems. Look for possibilities and opportunities. That, after all, is where creativity, innovation and satisfaction lies.
We need to be the student of our own teachings sometimes.
And there’s more. As much as we’ve had more family time, the idea about getting into debt with this barn has created tension in my relationship with my husband. He loves to renovate, and wants to do this for me! And yet, I try to slow him down. Don’t get me wrong – we’re good. It’s just my fear shoves its way into our conversations. Not fun.
So instead of looking at the rubble, how do I force myself to look at what’s most important, the barn? And support my husband to spend time doing what he loves (in turn using his love language of “acts of service”). Granted, the building is not perfect – the chimney’s crumbling, the roof needs replacing, one whole wall is rotting – but if look past all that, I see the potential. The opportunity. The dream coming to live in vivid technicolour.
The question is: how do we look at all the things that are working as a way of being able to get energy and power to be able to face our fears? To see that, in fact, maybe the opportunity is to get past them; that I had to feel this stifled, this challenged, this frustrated, right now, so that I could finally overcome this paralyzing fear of debt.
So, I am going to try it. We’re going to move ahead. I’m going to face my fears.
Do you have more tips? Suggestions for me about how to face our fears? Share them in the comments please! We all have fears. Let’s not let them stifle our greatness.
Is there something you’re facing, that you’re challenged with, that we could try to help you with? Share and let us help.
Really, so much of life is a matter of what you choose to focus on, isn’t it? Do you look at the mess, the rubble, and all the broken bits, or do you look up at the big vision, and big dream? I know which direction I will try to keep in focus. What about you?